I'll make the bisuits. You're on your own for anything else!

1. put self-rising flour in a BIG mixing bowl, so you'll have plenty of stirring room.  
2. slice up a stick of unsalted butter (there's salt already in the self-rising flour).
3. pinch the flour and butter together.  don't hurry.  keep pinching until you get a lot of little flour coated butter beads throughout.
4. pour in the buttermilk.
5. use a rubber spatular and fold the mix.  keep folding until it all comes together as one mass of dough.  it should not be too dry.  it should not be too moist.  it should be just right.
6. roll out the dough and cut out the biscuits (I used a glass to do the cutting).  place biscuits on foil (shiny side up) on the pan.
7. set the oven temperature at 400 degrees, and let the biscuits sit out while the oven preheats.
8. wash the dishes, and clean up the table when you rolled out the dough.
9. put pan of biscuits in the oven to bake for about 20 minutes.
10. make coffee and sip on it while the biscuits bake.
11. check the bottom of one of the biscuits.  when they're brown enough, remove the pan from the oven.
12. use a spatula to separate biscuits from the foil.
13. after a few minutes, place biscuits in a paper towel lined container.  cover with a lid.
14. I cooked a couple of sunny side up eggs and drizzled some molassis on my biscuits.